hahello world!
i got my PPR back today. im not sure if i should laugh or cry.
laugh because i got higher than 65%
cry because i got quite low compared to my brother and last term's %
so. how can i do both at the same time.
hmm. im still not planning to tell my mum that i got back my PPR.
i shall see one day by one day.
today was extremely fantastic.
with the simple fact that i enjoyed all my lessons today was kind of amazing. but yeah.
thanks to everybody who encouraged me:))
hmm. yeah. and im not going to BREAK.
music lessons were the best cause we slack like for the whole lesson.
chui lao shi was nice enough to allow us to play during her lessons.
yay. but something unpleasant did happen. but i shall not say.
all i can say is that i seriously dont know what to do when a conflict breaks out.
im not being a good monitor:((
sad.sad.sad
and how did madam lee know that i was weak in ALGREBRA.??!
she doesnt teach me maths.
o.O and for assembly today. we had a talk on self-harm.
i WAS ok with the topic at first. then i started to feel disgusted and felt like vomitting.
partly due to not eating my recess well and partly due to what it reminded me of in the hospital.
i went through it like a thousand and i rather choose to not remember the feeling.
cause it sucks.
then today during band, there was no sec3s and so sec2s and 1s were combining.
i was demoted to "very bad" when i played my tuning note. sighs
time to work even harder
then we played singapore rhapsody. and haha. i managed to survived.
well. it was ok lar. cause half the time i was sight reading and learning.
and hmmm. i shall somehow train myself to blow my tuba louder. i think i sound like a cat now. opps.
ohh! cat reminded me of what happened today.
we were having english literature when suddenly when heard this "meowwwwww"
and then we all turn and saw a black cat.
apparently, a teacher was trying in vain to catch it.
hmm. then my mind was back on the lesson. im set to mugging mode!! yay
and so back to band.
our section finally has a turner:)) hello tuner. but i shall not rely too much on the tuner, hmm.
and i need to buy new socks. my old ones are dying terribly:?
hahaha. we are going to spend quality time with miss sia on tues and thursday of school holidays but im not coming on thurs, why>
dont need to tell. those who know will know. those who dont will not. ahha
so simple. yay.
but yeah. i dont know if im supposed to cry or laugh that im not coming for band and leaving christine to be playing on her own. sorry girl:(
and my angel and mortal havent give me anything. thats so saddening. when will my letter come??
haha. i shall go sleep now. ta-ta people.
there is no school tomorrow. how sad. i want to go to school!
tomorrow is like the only day where i want to go to school or more likei need to go to school.
its teacher's day and i want to see my primary side teachers,
ohwells, how sad,
p/s i shall upload pictures soon.
and currently im still talking to chengmei who is brain dead. hmm
black&white makes grey. @1:45 AM
my mama me and my brother who refuses to smile
my bro is cam shy:)
the roller coaster my father and i dare to ride on. p/s i survived:))
my dear family. im still the shortest!!i shall stay positive:)))))
life must go on
though i think im still going to tear.
black&white makes grey. @11:30 PM
oh gecko
my desktop just died and all the information in it is lost
FOREVER.
great. all my projects, assignments, band songs, playlists, pictures are all gone.
everything is gone.
all the nice memories are also erasered.
great.
just great.
another thing to lower down my spirit.
oh what the.
i wish that happened to my PPR.
i would rather choose to be happy.
black&white makes grey. @10:05 PM
hmm. i havent been blogging for the past few days. kind of four days only but many things happened during that period.
hhaha. today was kind of smooth going for me other than the fact that PPR is coming back tomorrow. im not looking for to receiving my PPR.
not looking forward. i rather it didnt exist and make my life miserable when it already is.
this is the first time im not excited to receive my PPR cause i know i had done badly and my overall percentage will definitely decrease.
i just hope that it will be above 65% or there goes my day.
and it will be a long day tomorrow.
pulling a long face is definitely not a good start to a long and tiring day
but i cant help it if i decided to, i dont really have control over my facial expression
if not i would rather not smile for 24/7 cause my mouth hurts at the end of the day.
p/s you could try it if you want to:)
PPR is a sad topic. a very sad topic.
but its the maths score that im more worried about.
i got it back weeks ago but im not going to tell my mama until it is unavoidable.
cause i know what is going to happen.
1) she is going to blow her top.
2)wake up all the neighbours with shoutings and complains and let the whole world know whats going on
3) there goes my holiday.
4) im going to have to mug like shit.
hmm. not that mugging is a bad thing but mugging like shit means mugging for nearly 24/7 and i will just drop dead at the end of the day.
with the printer spoil, making me mug all day will just kill me.
on the happpier note, i went to AMKhub with sijia christine angelique and sarah.
we were buying presents for a lot of random people.
but we separated after. hmmm about an hour cause sarah, angelique and christine had to go to popular to get some teachers' day presents.
so me and sijia went to MOS and shared an iced milk tea.
i think the auntie wanted us to leave as she kept staring at us. o.O
sorry auntie.
then i went to meet claudia and weiyun to go home together.
hmm. and it was nice of weiyun to accompany me on bus 265 though she had to walked a little longer. thanks weiyun and sorry:)
and so im shall be off to do my colour wheel.
im shall not look forward to tomorrow.
bye bye.
black&white makes grey. @8:48 PM
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my favourite character. kerokerokeropi:)).jpg)
he is soooo cute:)).jpg)
his girlfriend:)).jpg)
sabrina was bored during c-lit and started writing nuts.jpg)
sabrina's #2 ramblings on me while she is bored/.O.jpg)
a rap for me by sabrina??!.jpg)
eh. sabrina is seriously too bored. another rambling to me from her.jpg)
in the end. it only meant one thing.. thats the lesson of the day.and so SAVE PAPER. SAVE TREE. SAVE GAIA. GO STRAIGHT TO THE POINT:))
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melissa's blur look.jpg)
molestation in progress p/s victim doesnt seem to mind..jpg)
molestation in progress p/s it has finally reached the top.jpg)
my piggy cup. melissa bought it for me with my money:))
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black&white makes grey. @9:43 PM
haha. forget about the previous post.
the past few days have been up down up down for me.
on the happier note.
there was drills yesterday.
our last drills with our SCs before CCA stand down.
and so starting from next week we will be seniorless.
sighs :(
haha. wednesday went out with angelique sarah and sijia to AMKhub.
we met a lot of people there and embarrassed ourselves like crazy.
how did we even got to go out?
simple. me angelique and sarah had nothing to do but didnt want to go home so we decided to go AMKhub. whereas sijia had to go for tuition around AMKhub area at 4 but didnt know what to do between 2 to 4 so haha. thats how we ended up at AMKhub.
and we ended up meeting almost the whole of ET section. o.O
oh. and i never got to see weiyun and claudia's photo taking.
dumb dumb claudia<
and so. back to friday we had drills.
at the starting, it was very soft. i could only hear myself belle's and sijia's timings.
maybe its because we are standing at the last row.
but after the water break, our timings became louder though it was not loud enough and so we did our timings one by one.
i thought that my timings was softer than what i say when we do it as a squad. and i realised that my timings are louder when we are doing it as a squad. i also dont know why.
after that. we had a squad talk.
it was kind of funny and ya. funny
then a photographer appeared and oh! ning xuan will appear in the yearbook.
it was so funny:)
because of squad talk. we missed sectionals.
i didnt know time passed so fast. but then when i went back bandroom i found a tuba at the section bench. but its neither mine nor christine's one so i guessed that it was christine's previous one. finally the mouthpiece could be removed.
then we had band talk. kind of funny.
and so i conclude that im as fast as seow!
when i stepped out of the band room i saw ayu ermms. i dont know what she was doing
but she was holding a water gun. erps.
guess what happened next. i got shot.
and by the way, i was still staring at her. opps.
then went to thomson plaza with the seniors and grace.
and on the sadder note.
im not looking forward to the last week of the term. though a week of holiday is following after it.
reason. im not looking forward into getting back my PPR results,
seriously not looking forward.
and i realise that relying on your PPR results isnt all that good.
on the brighter side, it motivates you to do better but at the same time it can make you think that you cant go on and you are going to stay there.
sighs. but in term 4 im going to do well. i will definitely make my pathetic life better.
hahahahhahah.
shit. i sound like i have gone mad.
and i have started revising on my review tests. yay!
i have started to make notes on all my subjects. including literature, dont ask me how i find anything to note down for literature cause in actual fact, i dont get it myself.
and im seriously not going to cry when im getting back my results.
haha. i shall look forward to ermm.. school and band:)
black&white makes grey. @8:15 PM
it was a sweet fairytale
a fairytale that i dont want to stop reading
a fairytale that i want to continue believeing.
but now i know that its not true
whats the use of believeing in it.
a stupid lie that worked its way through me for 12 years
a stupid lie that i believed when i was born
a stupid lie that i will continue to believe in
a stupid lie that i worried so much about
a stupid lie.
i dont know why i still do that
wasting money and time
i shouldnt have continue but
i dont want to show my disappointment
that unwillingness to continue on
but i'll wait..
Dont bother about what i wrote up there. its just my random ramblings.
and so many PPRs were given back during the week. though i got 2 good ones.
i realised that i never felt that sense of joy that my hardwork paid off
cause i know that at the end of the day, i'll still be at square one.
haha. im not unhappy. i make myself clear. they are just something that i happened to think about
black&white makes grey. @11:26 PM
hmm. i havent blog for 2 days.
not that bad.
i shall do some updating then:)
lets talk about friday first then.
fridays is one of my favourite days. its usually the one and only slacking day for me unless i got piles and piles of homework and assignment to chiong.
school was quite fun today.
i got back my maths scenairo. im so happy! i got 32/38
that was unexpected though.
and i dont think i will be staying happy for long. i bet with you that my part 2 of the scenairo will probably pull me down.
it will pull me down so much that i wished it didnt exist.
then it was lit-e. by the way, maths was after lit-e
teacher came in and only give us 30seconds to get everything ready. i panicked.
my table is in such a great mess. i feel like throwing everything out of the window.
hope i dont cost a life. erps
the teacher then ask us to do notes while she explain how to answer passage based.
she then started talking like a choo-choo train.
guess how i died there. she like never stopped to breathe.
well i guess she doesnt need air but i need!
and so i was writing and highlighting and copying and frowning the whole od the half an hour without stopping.
i bet i have grown older by the end of the lesson. jeez
so the next time she ever got us to copy notes. i will just prepare to die.
" pencils up! highlighters up! rulers up! chiong ar!!"
haha.then during recess me and weiyun managed to eat orange bowl:)
i got 10 fish balls thanks to meredith who didnt want hers:)
oh. and our 1hour recess became half an hour.
the other half an hour was spent doing my art reflection at the track. i wish i could have walked round it instead. enjoy the rain. but i most probably would have teachers screaming a me. so i was guai and did my indoors stuff instead.
then during art, my group have to rush through to finish the project.
so for not being good leader:(
but thank you for being such wonderful members. without your support, i most probably would have just died and melted away.
haha, i forget to mention that dipping my finger into a bottle of fabirc glue was a nice feeling:)
then we sat in a circle and started rocking each other[the whole class] then we were supposed to massade each other but it became torture for me because i was sensitive there.
but anyways thanks janice for massaging me:)
during malay, we had a test.
the answers were read out to us. we just need to listen and copy:)
BAND WAS FUN FUN FUN!!
drills was extremely fun:)
one reason was that i missed drills caused it was three weeks from the last and i love drills:)
today we did a lot of hanta-ing and marching.
our dressing is terrible though.
haha. once when we were marching, we marched into a puddle. it was not that bad till everyone was kicking water on me.
after that, to make those who never lock their arms lock them, we used coins:)
then we had to lock our arms so that the coins wont fall.
[i lost my 20 cents coin before the thing started*]
and now we have $1.75 for our squad fund:)
then we had to balance a book on our legs. so that means our legs have to be stable and 90degrees and lock our arms.
my book didnt drop at first[mine was a maths textbook]
then when everyone started dropping their books, i decided that dropping mine wasnt going to make much of a difference. anyways my legs were shaking like they have just visited the north pole:)
then PT was fun, especially double wacko.
i was the wacko 5 times.
and if you get the game, to be a wacko, you have to kill someone, then someone kills you then you are the wacko. guess how many people i killed. sorry guys o.O
and did i mentioned. lao zhang protecting me for three times. cool ayes.
i was screaming like a mad frog.
after that the whole squad went to the canteen to celebrates tessa's birthday. its belle's birthday too. we sang her a song during PT.
when we sang the birthday song for tesa in the canteen. it was so loud. i couldnt sing loud.
i had no voice after all the screaming:(
hee. then we took a squad photo with tessa. i realised how big our squad is o.O
then went for dinner with the sec2s:0
now back to today.
went for church yf.
grace was in her heaven after eating donuts from donut factory.
it was nice. especially the white one.
thanks to bella who went to queneue at the shop for 5mins since you woke up so early to get there. and dexter. i havent pay you $5 for CG fund. opps
and i cant go for the movies tmr cos im not free:(
but there is still BBQ. looking for ward to it. janice and joanne will be there.
yaya. time for my ramblings to end. haha
black&white makes grey. @10:53 PM
today was a great day:)
definitely for me.
haha. lessons today was sort of interesting in a way.
had assembly and i was jogging slower cause my knee bone started to hurt half way.
then when back to class and nominated Sandra and Weiyun to be our class photogenic girls
haha. then lessons after that was fun.
during maths, me and sabs were laughing like some crazy PUNTAK.
[realised that i only put singular for puntak cause im not a puntak!]
then science, i was more interested in the paper thingy experiment. wow. it was amazing.
recess was pre normal with the exception that Ayu suddenly called me and wanted food.
erps. no money..
but in the end weiyun told me what to do. hehe. thanks weiyun:)
jeez. then next was eng-lit. i nearly died when i thought i lost my worksheet. o.O
then music was fun fun fun.
me sabrina weiyun jiaxian and claudia were singing like mad fools and enjoyed ourselves.
later teacher gave us some moments to watch our xiyouji grace group preform.
tricia broke the carrot before the real thing :(
but haha. there is always a solution!
dont tell you
and BAND was great too.
miss sia wasnt here though so we had sectionals with third-fourth of the time with out the seniors.
haha. weird though. i practise lip slurs and intervals and appreggio and scales.
charlyne said i played like a cat. was laughing. haha. it was funny the wasy she said it.
ok. thats something to improve though. jiayou!
then my heart jump out. the trombone sec1s suddenly screamed and i found a pool of saliva beside me.
at least it wasnt on me. it was someone's book. erps.
then i was playing sousa with christine. haha. fun playing with her.
o.O 5o'clock. time for main band combine with out miss sia without both student conductors
the sec1s sat in but brought instruments just in case we were require to play.
and jeez. i drop my mouth piece again. the 6th time. i confirm pump.
but haiching and ayu told me that no matter how many times i drop will still only pump once. but its best to not drop your instrument and any parts of it. haha. yay!
of course i will take care of my instrument. i cant imagine what will happened if i dropped it.
haha. during main band combine. we started with tuning. i dont know why i played until so soft.
seriously. i better play louder or charlyne will make me run 10rounds round the track.
erps. then main band played hanukkah. i was going to put down my tuba. then haiching wanted me to try to play. o.O
i thought she was kidding me.
so in the end i played. cause she reassured me that she wanted me to try to play.
the starting of hanukkah was ok. i could play but i played softly in case i made any mistake.
then coming to the middle i started getting lost. erps.
then i would stare at the score trying to listen to where the seniors were playing.
either haiching pointed out to me where they were or i figured it out myself.
but most of the time, she pointed it out. i cant seem to hear and relate it to the score. must go clear my ears. anyways thanks haiching! haha.
i like the part erm i think before the trombone or the tuba solo. or whatever. hehe.
and at the back part:) hanukkah is nice.
then we played when you believed from prince of eygpt. i thought i dont need to play. cause none of the sec1s were. o.O
then haiching wanted me to try so anyways, i liked that song so i tried lar.
haha. quite ok. much easier than hanukkah and slower. :)
then its time to go.
our whole section was staring at charlyne playing. so funny.
it was weird too. haha. then thats the end.
i wanted to wait for someone to go home with me. but i seriously need to rush for tuition so i couldnt wait anymore. hee.
weiyun- i waited with you till christine came. im nice right.
then i went to buy star folding paper before i went for class. class was great,
i like doing summary.
im in a good mood today. and tomorrow that is PT and DRILLS.
i miss drills dearly.
its been like ages since the previous one and our timings became soft. :(
but i want drills.
for now. my rambling ends here.
black&white makes grey. @11:49 PM
i found this on sandy's blog.
its so cuuute!!
i know im lagging but this is the first time i could get into sandy's blog.
black&white makes grey. @12:12 AM
tooken from teens o.O
i drew that. wow
my dear little bunny. cute?!
he is going to run. a little dim. erps
time to watch your face. wash wash!
taken at weiyun's house. claudia's pearly white teeth
claudia the model for our PBL
weiyun's hair mistoken for grass??! whoo
miss teacher weiyun. i hope she is up to it o.O
it was supposed to be weiyun but she changed it!! i drew it!!
good friends!! haha. my talking people:)gracia, zit qing weiyun me! carolyn
grace ho!! at XI'AN airport
cute right??!
the other lovelies!! they are sooo cute!
three yellows one red>yellows win
black&white makes grey. @8:55 PM
hello!!
Singapore is 42years old now!!
im soo love the NDP this year. well, at least it was much more exciting than last year's one.
and i want the star thingy.
jeez. choo went for NDP but she wasnt fated to have a fan.
poor porku choo!!
i was sms-ing weiyun throughout the whole NDP
guessing stuff and wats cute.
haha.
even before the NDP parade, i was at weiyun's house.
doing project.
we were doing home economics PBL.
claudia me weiyun and jiaxian
our group was experimenting with pads.
wow! haha. dont shock yourselves out. we rip the pads open.
funny!!
ok.. then we were playing "golf"
gecko. i won.
then dumb jia won all the spelling games
so her name should be smart jia but still she is dumb jia.
and i like suan-ing her. i want coke jia xian!!
haha
gee. then i took one bus stop down and ended up at weiyun's grandmama's house.
im not with weiyun so you probably dunno what i was there for.
and so i shall enlighten you.
i alighted. yes i alighted and i was wondering if i was in the correct place.
i was a blur. i stared at the block for 10secs before i realised that i was at the place i wanted to be. jeez. people must have thought i was a mad man.
more like mad woman.
anyways, the stall i wanted to go was closed so i aimlessly
[quote from christine seow] "walking into the sea."
and ended up buying two pads of stickers. folding stars paper. rubber bands and a comb
random stuff but i was feeling bored.
i'm going to be back at the same place again tomorrow because smart weiyun wanted me to lend her harry potter book 7 and she doesnt want me to give her during school hours.
moral of the story: dont shout out what you have -grinns
but actually, it would be rather nice if i can take a walk. haha. so i agreed.
and so i'll will go to THAT shop and get what i want.
and im getting hooked onto a book.
that means sleeping late nights just to read it.
its unhealthy but im reading a BOOK
hahah
REWIND REWIND
yesterday i was out with friends.
i saw claudia and scream her name in a shopping mall.
guess how much i embarrassed myself. jeez.
but it was worth. she told me she heard it. just didnt not it was from me.
haha. yesterday was funn!! well sianz at first
then the fun part was sitting at starbucks and NOT drinking coffee.
well, we sat there longer then a pig would cry and we were laughing so insanely i think we just embarrassed ourselves.
haha. but went home quite tired. and then i woke up at 1am
and i couldnt go back to sleep. i also cannot blog. thhe interenet was insane.
maybe too high due to national day.jeez.
now FORWARD FORWARD
back to today.
sorry its so confusing.
so i came back and i found a sinister looking bag on my counch. haha
more like i was curious to open it,
hhaaha. nice clothes!! for me!! yay
mama bought it. how thought ful of her
and now i shall go upload pictures!!
they will be upload sooooooo:D
black&white makes grey. @12:29 AM
irritating.
sorry my friends.
sorry for the sudden change.
i did not mean it.
sorry
black&white makes grey. @11:52 PM
i need to seriourly improve on my attitude..
i should seriously stop dropping dead everywhere i go,
stop thinking of sleeping in class
stop trying to use other lessons to do other lessons homework
pay attention to the even most boring classes
stop daydreaming about random things
stop thinking that something bad is bound to happen to me
stop sleeping at unearthly hours
stop having bad time management
dont be a lazy bug
do all my homework when im free even when its not due the next day
study like shit for tests
come early on school days
stop being a cry baby..
gee.. thats a lot
i think the last one should be ignored..
haha.. guess im getting on the bubbly side now. hope it wouldnt go down the drain on monday.
black&white makes grey. @1:04 AM
it has been a horrible week.
for me.
3 tests in a row. gosh. sleeping 3 hours a day doesnt help much either.
im tired; sick;helpless
i thought of letting go everything and left it to...??
NO. but i shall not do that. im only a pathetic sec 1. i shall mug like mad.
i shall not fail anymore. i don't want to look at my paper and feel like tearing it up after that.
today was terrible.
i woke up to find out how late i was for school and that i havent studied for my tingxie.
i wanted to study in school. but gosh, i dont have the time.
so i endure the whole tingxie clueless to what luo lao shi was mumbling.
its so alien cause i didnt study and ended up having to strain my brain to get the words out.
be glad that i didnt hand up a blank piece of paper.
great. life has to contiune tortuing me.
maths.. my weakest subject.
im a gecko at almost every chapter. i have to struggle to understand one question while the rest
of the people have already move on with life.
i always struggle during maths lessons, not that its hard to understand but the problems lies
with my dumb small tiny brain that is not absorbent enough.
i dont want to go back to where i started out, as a primary six struggling to get the maths
concept in my brain and working like a mad fool to only get a pathetic 60/100-the marks are an
example.. ahaha
i dont want to struggle with maths.
i was so happy i got an A* for maths during PSLE. i thought it improve.
ya. it did, term1 and 2 were like, Maths is easy!
whoots, i pass every test with flying colours and i was never once disappointed at my marks.
term3 showed no mercy. i deproved. tests after tests i still failed. no matter how hard i slog my
brain out. i still failed. im still at the first step. i can never learn to climb.
i dont want to be that pathetic primary six kid i used to be. i want to get on with my life.
my maths will improve. it will, i promised.
thank you sandra for your encouragement.
trying hard to put a smile on my face. it seems hard to do that these few days. for now, let me
drift off to somewhere far away.
but band made my day.
i was happy there. haha. we learn SOUSA. and sursprisingly, i managed to learn finish the whole
thing. there isnt much range in the notes so its just the rhythm that im struggling with. time
pass faster today. i only run through the whole of sousa thrice and the bell rings!
boo. but i think that was enough for the day, my lips hurt.
heeps, then went to sijia's house and ended up walking to the prata shop to buy something.
ended up meeting the seniors. haha.
i just learned that sijia could become a bowl of curry. interesting.
then went back to sijia's house cause the seniors were interested with the drum set.
then talk talk laugh laugh and that was the end.
i of course started smiling again, my troubles seemed to fade away but i know that is will always
be there. its just tuck in a corner.
there's always a never-ending list of sadness hidden somewhere-what is there to
cry for then when you know that it will repeat again. someday somehow.
it's not like im sad or anything lar.. im hapy already. those were just what i thought when i
received my stupid test paper.
black&white makes grey. @12:28 AM
gecko lar.
feeling down recently.
well, not exactly down but ya. just not really in the bubbly mood.
BOO
i cant seemed to get things right.
they are either delayed; not done; or not done well.
in fact they were never right.
they were always wrong, too wrong.
the thing i felt happy most was the decorating of the classroom for ndp2007.
it fun doing this type of things especially with your friends.
at least i achieve something today
so i feel more meaningful??
so today, me weiyun claudia jiaxian zihui valerie and yingyu stay back to do the decorations
at the first hour, only me weiyun jiaxian and claudia were doing the deco cause
the others went to get materials..
haha. had a fun time. and my hair loves the red paint so much that it decided to absorb some
rahh!
gee, later the uncle got angry with us so we packed and left.
me jiaxian and weiyun went to the canteen. drank chocolate milk:D
then i went back to class to find jiahui and home with her.
i realise that classroom door wasnt lock yet and i called weiyun and jiaxian
in the end, they ran back and we contiune doing the deco until 6.30
jiahui had to wait. SORRY
then we talk and talk till we went different ways
haha, of course we talked:D
and ya. doing maths.
black&white makes grey. @10:05 PM
